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Steven JC Johnson (Friday, 20 July 2012 19:51)
That was a good read. I hope Kate's toe-kissing does the trick... :)
Tom Etherington (Saturday, 21 July 2012 07:41)
Strong character based narrative. Good read
Elizabeth Swan (Sunday, 22 July 2012 05:59)
Good story - well written.
Isabella Tellez Garita (Sunday, 22 July 2012 11:27)
Great story, excellent writing, surprising this didn't make it at least on to long list.
Layla (Sunday, 22 July 2012 14:36)
Well done, Fraser. I felt afterwards her partner seems a nice guy and think he'd probably understand her predicament. I'd like to see more of this and see how that conflict would be explored. It's
got a nice pace to it also.
Fraser (Sunday, 22 July 2012 19:07)
isabella - thanks for your kind words . i was a bit dissapointed about not making it through but it is a bit of a lottery because one reader will love something that another will hate. Layla thanks
also, i did write it with the idea of people wanting more but maybe that ewas its downfall!
Reg Lacey (Sunday, 22 July 2012 22:36)
Just read this script. great little story. And it didnt make the top 500??? dont get it
Craig (Monday, 23 July 2012 09:59)
Why have the bit with the letter? Only had 2 pages so move on quicker. Use the space you have to show more about Andy not liking her seach for her mother.
Fraser (Monday, 23 July 2012 11:15)
Good point Craig. I guess I could have dropped that but it tied in with the imagery of the other 4 letters blue black pink and white. Might try and rewrite it without That thanks
Nigel Sheppard (Monday, 23 July 2012 15:21)
Solid effort, unlucky for not making it through.
Mitch (Tuesday, 24 July 2012 20:20)
Proof once again that there is some rock solid stuff in the Near Kisses pile. Well done.