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Matt (Friday, 20 July 2012 16:43)
Be nice to read this, but sadly the link doesn't work.
Jaye (Friday, 20 July 2012 17:43)
A sweet story, but a little too expositional for me.
50kisses (Saturday, 21 July 2012 10:07)
The link is working so do please try again
Steve (Saturday, 21 July 2012 13:18)
I think it's written well but I think it's a bit 'on the nose' I believe is the expression.
Craig (Saturday, 21 July 2012 22:15)
To much talking but nothing worth hearing, dont need to know what icecreem they want. Nothing happened.
Jake (Sunday, 22 July 2012 15:28)
What Craig said. You may as well have them tell us what they had for breakfast. There's nothing new or interesting here I'm afraid.
Nigel Sheppard (Wednesday, 25 July 2012 08:02)
My immediate thoughts having read this were what's the story, where is it going or where has it been? The characters are clearly in love but that's not enough by itself. Something has to happen for
it to be a story.