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Matthew Hibbit (Thursday, 23 August 2012 00:36)
I think that your work is fantastic! I love your writing and the only constructive criticism I can think of with this has nothing to do with the writing itself; it's with the concept as to stand out
in this field you need something that's going to make people really remember you. This, although well written, needs more of an innovative concept (though admittedly this is difficult with such a
short length of the script and is difficult generally). Having said that, what you have done is wonderful.
Paigey Thorpe (Thursday, 23 August 2012 00:58)
I enjoyed reading it, and found it gripping from almost the start, what is amazing with such a short piece of writing. I think you have done an amazing job at setting up the story and giving the
story some idea. This makes the reader want to know what else is going to happen. I want to know whats happened before and whats going to happen in the end.
Are they going to stay together? What is it that has happened to start all of this?!
I don't think I can really fault it, though as Matt said you need an idea that will make you stand out, but again with what he said it is extremely hard to get that in such a short piece of writing,
but the fact it is already so gripping is a massive success.
You're an amazing writer and so amazingly talented. I think you'll be able to go far in the writing business. Good Luck and well done :D